I’ve noticed lately that there has been a really big SAHM movement, where they’re all like, “I have the most important job in the world, I deserve a pat on the back. ” Good for a stay-at-home-mother that her husband/baby’s daddy makes enough money to cover ALL the finances. Good for them, that, when they have a child, they want to center their next 5+ years around taking care of that child/other children/the house. Good for them that they have the patience to put up with that lifestyle. All in all, Good for them!
But seriously, this movement has caused a alter-feminism movement that is taking it a bit far. Everyone in today’s world LOVES to play the victim card, and use it try to gain advantages/positive opinions of others, or perhaps validation. What about the mom’s that cannot stay at home with their children all day long, every day? What about those that are married to/living with men and the total of their finances cannot be covered with Daddy’s income?
What about the women out there that, after six weeks of maternity leave, flirting with the idea of being a SAHM, they have to get back to the same ol’ routine of going to work all day, and tend to that ‘Mom stuff’ and ‘house stuff’ AFTER working all day, and before an early bedtime because they have to wake up super early and start the cycle all over again? What about the mom’s that have to spend quality time with their precious babies (that grow up SO fast, right?) AFTER working an 8 hour workday? Or have to stuff that quality time with that baby (You know, babies grow up much faster when you don’t spend 24 hours a day, 7 days a week with them) on the weekends, when all that compounding dishes/laundry/grocery-shopping/cleaning-the-filthy-house hasn’t been done all week, because they’ve been too busy trying to squeeze in making supper and quality time with baby in on weeknights? We don’t have as much ‘fun family time’ on the weekends, because that’s when the ‘work’ of a SAHM mom throughout the weekdays (when daddy’s at work making that cash!) has to then be done, by the Working Mothers (and dads). Well, I’d say, where’s the movement of the working mothers? Jeez, that may just sound like it sucks a little bit worse than having all day every day to spend with your kids and clean house, and home-make meals, because you actually have the time to clean it/time to make it.
You don’t see working mothers ganging up on posts here and there declaring that we work so hard, mainly because WE DON’T HAVE THE TIME!! There is no movement of the Working Mother’s, because we’re too busy doing what a SAHM does in 8 hours, in 3 hours, after our 8 hour working days. That would leave 0 time for scoping out passive-aggressive posts that maybe could be taken personally, TAKING them personally, and back-lashing something fierce.
You also don’t see THIS working mother needing to “take time away from the house”. I spend 40 hours a week working away from that house, so when I have ANY time I can spend away from work, I WANT TO BE AT HOME! I don’t want to go out to eat with other ladies and talk ‘girl talk’ over lattes. I want to be at HOME, with my family, that my job keeps me from all week long! I don’t want to go out to a nice restaurant to ‘unwind’, I want to take the time to make a 3 hour roast AT HOME, because weekdays do not allow time for a three-hour-roast.
All in all, my maternity leave was nice, in that it was the only 6 week period of my ENTIRE LIFE that I got to:
1. Sleep in until 8 am everyday (Yes, even with a NEWBORN)
2. Eat a nice home-cooked meal that wasn’t rushed every night
3. All the dishes/laundry/cleaning/shopping was done the entire time
4. NAPS! Everyday, whenever I felt like it
5. I enjoyed staying up late each night
6. I got that entire time with my little baby
WOULD I chose the lifestyle of a SAHM mom over my current Working Mother lifestyle, if we had the financial means? NOT in a million years! It was hard work, as in physical labor with no reward, and although I did get to see my daughter 100% of the time, absence does make the heart grow fonder. There’s also that ‘validation’ thing, where I kind of felt like a loser, because my whole life was centered around a baby at home for a month and a half.
I only feel sorry for the Working Mothers out there that work more than 40 hours a week, and/or have more than one children. Or better yet, SINGLE MOTHERS! I won’t go into all that, but MY mom was a Single Working Mother of THREE CHILDREN up until I was nine years old. I wouldn’t even want to think about how hard/monotonous this was for her. She is a very strong woman because of this, and I commend her greatly. I would say if ANY mothers in this lifetime deserve a ‘pat on the back’ it would be SINGLE WORKING MOTHERS, because they really do have it harder than the rest of us.